I Have Noticed That I Sound Somewhat Delusional On This Blog

 

It's true--the things I'm saying make me sound out of touch with reality.  I can snap out of it, sort of, but the issue is, although I have radically accepted that I might go to jail, I have perhaps somewhat amusingly not radically accepted that there might be no arrests in my case.


Maybe I will start to feel better if I radically accept that too.  That's a lot to handle.  It seems kind of unlikely that no one will ever help me...people show up at the grocery store and make gestures that make it seem like they are aware of things about me, e.g., I think I saw someone at H-E-B who knew I was about to radically accept the possibility of conviction and jail, even before I had thought of that.  So does that person want to help me?


My sense of it is, yes, there are doctor-spies out there who are trying to help me.  Reality-testing-proofreading that, line by line, yes, that sounds a little off, but I think it's true.  I believe in the idea that the "zest" for getting me, by so many people, would seem to suggest that there is not only probable cause but plenty of evidence that foreign spies bribed a lot of the people responsible for my current legal problems.  I think it is not clear if an end date exists yet, but it is being fought for.  Probably, intelligence agencies across the world read my blog, including within the USA.  I suspect there is some sort of major obstacle at the DOJ in the way of helping me.  Maybe it's a coalition of the crooked that ASW, my evil father, worked to build for his own selfish reasons when he worked at the DOJ as a lawyer years ago.


Anyway, I think the date is a mystery.  I have tried to tell myself, "pretend you're hired as a CIA analyst, and your job is to analyze for the CIA the task of figuring out the date when you will be helped by the FBI."  I tried that, and I guess I should stick to math and economics, because I'm not too good at developing good, clear evidence supporting any date disclosure in code.  I don't even know where to start.  Shouldn't I know this?  I was so interested in cryptology in college, and now, I can't obtain one fact using cryptographic or steganographic principles!  Oh well.


I'm not going to call the FBI or email any psychologists from the past.  I'm going to try to limit my internet use and have pleasant days.  I'm going to forget about the job and trying to hire a new lawyer.  At this point, the entire courtroom is essentially metaphorically naked 24/7, including in court, so the answer is not "another lawyer" but instead law enforcement help--these bad guys must be arrested, they aren't even pretending to protect my rights.


OK, no more typing for now.


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